They were just AWFUL

That’s Pulguito and Chunguita at Ravenswood Christmas.

We went out to dinner last night, to Coco’s. They were terrible. They didn’t listen. They were LOUDLOUDLOUD, and at one point, Chunguita tackled Pulguito on the booth bench. We’re considering military school.

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Abstinate, so far

Today is a new day, and I’m abstinate so far. I decided I needed to leave work if I was going to stop eating the chocolate, so I finished up the xmas shopping … well, almost. I went to Mervyn’s which doesn’t have anything to eat, then to Target, which has a Starbuck’s. I stopped and got a nonfat, decaf latte, but I did NOT get a maple oat scone. I was pretty proud of myself for that.

So today is another day. I did not take a chocolate as I walked in, and so far, so good.

Last night, I went to OA. It was good to hear that most everyone struggles with step 1 every day. It made me feel a little less hopeless.

I wish my husband were really on board with this. His attitude makes me think that he thinks that my going to OA is a royal pain in the ass, a total inconvience.

I don’t think I’m going to exercise today.

Chocolate

BIG SIGH.

Someday, someday, I will take step one, admit that I am powerless over food, that it makes my life unmanageable. But that wasn’t this morning. There is a box of chocolates on the secretary’s desk just inside the door to the office suite. And I took one, thinking, I’ll just have one. I’m not even enjoying them anymore, but I still keep eating them.

Today is My Birthday

I’m 40!

After talking it over with the shrink and thinking about it, I decided that Sabrina would not be a good sponsor for me. I don’t think she has an eating disorder. She says that portion control is really her only problem. I considered asking Nora, but she has a new baby. The shrink says that I should have someone who has had at least a year of recovery, and that leaves Nora out. Nora would be good. I think she has a very similar problem to me, and she’s worked the steps. Hali was an option, too, but she would be long distance sponsor which the shrink doesn’t think is good for someone starting the steps. So …

I really have to go to another meeting. It’s just so hard to find the time. I resent having to be away from the kiddos in the evening. I just don’t know what I’m going to do.

Birthday

Gosh, I’ve been busy. I usually can post every other day or so, and it’s been a whole week!

We’ve got presents ready for Christmas. I put a few under the tree last Friday, and it took Chunguita a day to find them. One was immediately ripped, which she reported as soon as it happened. When I took the present to fix it, I asked her if we needed to “hide” the presents. She said, no. Before I was done fixing the ripped paper, she came back to me and told me we needed to hide the presents. So she and Pulguito helped me clear off a shelf in my closet and carry the presents out of the living room to stow in the closet.

On Saturday, we had accumlated a large pile of wrapped presents in the garage, far too many to fit on the closet shelf. DH and I talked to Chunguita about where we could put the presents and have them safe. She didn’t think they should be in her reach. We decided to put them on top of the cabinets that separate the dining room from the kitchen.

That afternoon, we celebrated my birthday with a fruit tart, and I got to open my presents. Pulguito was very excited and helped me open them. Then he climbed up the back of his chair to get the xmas presents down to be opened. Very cute.

Yesterday, we went into Oakland to have an early dinner with David, Mom, and Dad. Everything was going well, when Chunguita threw up all over Robert. He was able to get cleaned up and finish his meal, but we decided to go home early. Oh, well. That’s why I became a parent.

The other side of the purse12/20/2004 01:41:11 PM

Were you wondering if I was going to share the other side of the purse? I’ve been so busy. Chunguita has been sick with a tummy bug. We celebrated my birthday this weekend. I’m 40, today. Anyway, I celebrated on Saturday with DH, Chunguita, and Pulguito. They gave me an espresso machine which I LOVELOVELOVE. On Sunday, we got all dressed up and drove into Oakland to meet my family at Kincaid’s. Kincaid’s used to be my favotire restaurant, and this time it was okay, but not great, kinda salty. The last time, it was just awful, but I had totally forgotten that. Right when the soup and salad arrived, Chunguita threw up on DH. He had managed to get her away from the table, so she threw up on the floor and on him. So we ended up leaving early. I remind myself that it was to experience things like this that I had children. I didn’t get any sewing done this weekend.

I started this side of the bag with the same burnout panne as on the other side. On this side, in addition to the unstable stretchy panne problems, I had problems with a polyester silky fabric. I didn’t have trouble with it on the other side. I think the difference is that on the other side, it was an interior fabric; that is, it was sewn down on all 4 sides. On this side, it was at the edge. I had terrible problems with it bagging. I don’t know if I stretched it or what. Note to self: interface this sort of fabric before using for crazy patch.

I used decorative stitches on the seams. On one seam, I sewed down a wide velvet ribbon. It looks like another bit of the patchwork. On top of everything I couched yarns and threads. I used to really like this look, but I think I’m ready to move on to something new.